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That Ginger, Anna

That Ginger, Anna

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13 Reasons Why: Reality or Glorification?

23 Sunday Apr 2017

Posted by That Ginger, Anna in Commentary, Media

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

13 reasons why, blog, bullying, depression, High school, netflix, personal, pop culture, review, spoilers, suicide, writing

I am an avid Netflix binge-watcher and a couple of weeks ago after freshly cleaning out my queue I was looking for something else to watch. Netflix suggested (and I chose) 13 Reasons Why. I haven’t read the book, I didn’t know it was a hit, I had absolutely no preconceived notions or prior information about anything to do with the story. The first episode caught me off guard and I thought perhaps I was too old to enjoy the story, but then I was hooked. I binged it over a two or three day period and absolutely loved it. Loved it in a dark, cathartic, ripping-the-band-aid off way. I posted on Facebook about it and several friends (of various demographics) agreed that they loved it or planned on watching it, and I saw a few articles about school districts suggesting parents and students watch it together. I thought: cool, this was a realistic show and I hope people take some lessons from it and that was that.

Then I started reading posts about people who HATED the show. A friend posted a status about the fact she would never finish it because it glorified suicide. A Catholic magazine I follow posted an article with a warning from clergy stating that people shouldn’t allow their kids to watch it because it glorified suicide. Other viewers and critics said they thought the show was over-dramatic and that high school really isn’t that bad. And I continued to see posts stating the show portrays suicide positively. I thought about it at length and realized it connects to something my last post touched on: the idea that talking about or portraying something in pop-culture dediabolisizes or normalizes it. I talked about my disagreement with this idea in the political arena, but it fits here too.

*SPOILERS*

If you haven’t watched the show or don’t plan to, this might be helpful.

So, I’ll get right to it. I don’t think this show normalizes, glorifies, dediabolisizes, or portrays suicide positively.

I understand why people may think the show portrays suicide as a solution (especially if they didn’t watch the entire series) because in fact, Hannah’s peers only understand how their actions impacted her after she kills herself and they choose to listen to the tapes she leaves behind. But the show does not portray suicide as a solution to Hannah’s problems.

The show never shows that Hannah killing herself or recording the tapes has any effect on she and Jessica’s rapist. Their rapist never hears her tapes. He is not held accountable for his crimes. Her death does not fix Jessica’s pain. Her parents financial problems are not fixed-in fact, her death makes them worse. Her death and her reasons for killing herself do not solve any of the problems she used to justify killing herself. Her death leads directly to another student being shot in the head (we don’t know the details surrounding that situation, yet). Her death allowed her to escape her circumstances as all death does, but the producers and author never even elude to the fact that suicide “fixes” anything. *Her tape to Clay does contribute to him being nice to Skye, buy his tape clearly states he was always nice to Hannah too.

The show also certainlyyy did not portray suicide as the easy way out. If we are to believe the tapes, this was far from an easy choice for Hannah. It took thirteen separate encounters for her to decide to do it. She didn’t get knocked down in the hall one day and decide, “Welp, imma slit my wrists tonight”. Her rape wasn’t even enough to make her kill herself.  She tried-12 times-to move on, to ignore, to make new friends and 13 times her efforts were met with yet another incident. The show does not portray suicide as an easy decision.

I’ve also seen posts stating that the tapes were a way to get revenge. I don’t see it that way at all. She thoroughly and diligently explains how each interaction with these 13 people made her feel. She got revenge in a passive way, of course. Those people will have to live with the knowledge of how their actions (even if they weren’t violent or mean) led to the death of someone, which is definitely some serious baggage to carry around. She uses the tapes as a way to explain why she did what she did, not as a way to seek revenge. Clay seeks revenge on her behalf, but her suicide is portrayed as an escape not as vengeance. The whole point is that she made the tapes so that people would listen to them and understand how their actions contributed to her suicide. It shows that children (and all people, really) just want to be listened to. She could have written notes. She could have left nothing behind. The emphasis is on the tapes for a reason and that reason isn’t to convince victims to kill themselves.

Also, the show explains that a HUGE part of Hannah’s suicide was caused by her OWN actions, not her victimization. Not only does it show that she ultimately chose to end her life, but two or three of the tapes (maybe more, I can’t remember) center around the fact that she did something wrong. She watched her friend be raped and did nothing. Her PTSD caused her to reject Clay and in turn made her blame herself for hurting him. The show made her an active participant in her downfall. While ultimately she was a victim, it did not paint her as someone who just had some bad stuff happen to them and decided to get revenge. If she was seeking vengeance, she was seeking it against herself as well as her peers.

Lastly but most importantly for my defense of the show, throughout the show the counselor and his lack of professionalism are emphasized time and time again. His character’s conscience is burdened from the start because he knows he did not act correctly to prevent Hannah’s death. By the end, we know that Hannah asked for professional help before killing herself! She did the right thing! She did what we are all taught to do! She asked for help. She went to a professional. She dropped her pride and fear and went to an adult. After trying 12 other times to avoid situations, to avoid being antagonized, to ignore her tormentors, to make new friends, to find love, to have fun, to express her pain through art (poetry), to anonymously ask for help (that letter in class), to change her attitude, she asked an adult for help. And that adult could not or would not or did not know how to help so then she took her life.

Bullying is a problem. Sexual assault is a problem. Yes, high school (and college and graduate school and the workplace) is that bad. People are that mean. Bullying often isn’t a singular event. People’s actions impact other’s in ways they never realize. Some children (and adults) kill themselves after they are bullied. This show portrays that in an in-your-face kind of way. Yes, it isn’t perfect. No, you shouldn’t watch it if self harm causes you to act out (although there are trigger warnings for the episode in which she kills herself, so perhaps you could just skip that one). Yes, Bryce avoiding any consequences is problematic. Yes, not addressing mental health is problematic. Yes, it’s painful to watch. I could go on. But if I listed all of the problems this show has, the glorification of suicide would not be one.

 

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“I’m on Top of the Worlddd”-The Dude That Couldn’t Fit on the Piano

03 Wednesday Jun 2015

Posted by That Ginger, Anna in Personal and Fun

≈ 4 Comments

Tags

blog, enjoyment, film noir, fulfilment, girl, graduate student, happiness, happy, Italy, life, living, movies, noir summer, peace, personal, shellys cabaret, simple, single, student, Travel, traveling, WODW, woman, world, write or die wednesdays, writing, zen

Yeah, it was “king” but whatever 😝

WODW

This week’s prompt asks us to recount a time when we were on top of the world!

Two things came to mind: hiking the Haiku Stairs in Hawaii as a kid (physically on top of the world) and a recent blog I read from last year.

NOT MY PICTURE

A week ago (thanks to that freakin’ Facebook flashback-which I both love and hate) I read a blog from my trip to Italy. I had experienced the definition of my perfect day, but I had forgotten about it until Facebook reminded me. I reread the blog and it made me excited all over again, but also sad that that day was so phenomenal and so great and I had already forgotten about it. I really was on top of the world. It was one of my many fantasies come to life and that does not happen often. Nevertheless, I started thinking and I am on top of the world anytime I have a good moment.

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I am high maintenance in some ways (I hate gross smelling places, I hate rude people, I hate public embarrassment, I like organization, etc.) but being happy is not one of them. I am happy sitting at home watching Netflix all day, happy going to see/experience new stuff, happy going to work and handling things correctly, happy watching a good YouTube video, happy going fishing, happy when nothing bad happens. I try to act chill and I do like doing chill things, but I am a very passionate person. This means I can get really mad and sad sometimes, but it also means simple stuff can make me really happy and make me feel on top of the world. I get overly excited about stuff and nerd out pretty hard. I really, really love many things: wine, I Love Lucy, hiking, snorkeling, clothes, books, cheese, chick flicks, farms, cows, accents, languages, movies, music, other cultures, food, etc. So anytime I get to do anything involving things I love, I feel on top of the world.

CHEESE+POTATO

That’s a a bubble of cheese, with potato in it…aka Heaven…aka Frico

Today, I went to the library and checked out a compilation of Walt Whitman poems. I opened it and saw that one of the poems in Leaves of Grass is titled “To a Historian” and I got a little giddy since I study history. (I also nerded out because Noah reads Whitman to Allie in The Notebook and on her first day at Sarah Lawrence her professor writes out Leaves of Grass on the board and my boss’ son works for that university…this is why I have no friends LOL) Anyway, this is just an example of the kinds of things that can make me feel on top of the world—even if it is for a short period.

Capture

The last time I was on top of the world for more than a few minutes was Monday! I slept in, cleaned my apartment, talked to friends, cooked, did dishes, washed and did my hair, laid out my clothes for tomorrow, did my nails, worked out, had a glass of wine, watched Gossip Girl and The Bachelorette and I started a new free online class about film noir. I accomplished all of my goals, got to rest, got to learn something new, and got to prepare for the week without any anxiety or looming deadlines. It was a chill day, but I was motivated and accomplished things, so I was really happy and relaxed. It is summer break!

SN: If you like classic movies or films noir, I encourage you to check out that free class. It takes like 5 minutes a day to participate. TCM and Ball State University organized it and it lasts 5 weeks. The professor provides a short clip and introduction to a film every Monday through Thursday for the next 5 weeks and on Fridays TCM airs each film in its entirety. You chat with classmates and other viewers via Twitter (#NoirSummer) and the TCM message boards. If you want to participate fully in the class, you can take a few quizzes and a final assessment and you get a certificate! Definitely something fun and free that gives you an introduction to film history/analysis!

NOT MY PICTURE

I could obviously spend two paragraphs describing some fantasy day on the beach with a man drinking, listening to music and eating good food. Or walking around Rome and going back to an apartment to watch old movies and smoke cigars, but through many disappointments I’ve learned that if your fantasies are the only things that put you on top of the world, you’re going to be miserable for a big part of your life-which kind of sucks. I am not going to lie and say my expectations never get in the way of being on top of the world. I am a normal female being and I do create ideal situations in my head that I wish would happen and usually don’t, which leads to anger and annoyance, but I do work hard all the time to try and be happy in everyday situations (like getting a Whitman book from the library).

That being said, situations like in my blog from Italy, when I am traveling and meeting new people and doing exciting things, put me on top of the world for a much more prolonged period of time than checking out a book-obviously.

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When was the last time you were on top of the world? Hopefully it was more exciting than cleaning and watching TV, haha! Well, I guess the better question would be how often are you on top of the world?

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Happy 2015!

04 Sunday Jan 2015

Posted by That Ginger, Anna in Personal and Fun

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

bronx, dallas to nyc, geocaching, New York City, NYC, personal, resolutions, student, twenty something, woman

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What’d I tell ya? I absolutely suck at maintaining a blogging schedule. Needless to say, I was completely overwhelmed at the end of last semester so I didn’t blog at all.

I had a major leak in my kitchen, my air-mattress developed a leak, I found mice in my kitchen, had to write 50 pages, had to pack for my trip home for Christmas, and then I got the flu (despite getting the vaccine back in October)-all within 3 weeks. This was my first time living on my own and being a full-time student and it was really challenging. I realize that’s pretty shitty and privileged, considering I’m now 26 years old, but either way, being a student, working, and living by myself took a little getting used to and there were some major growing pains around finals time. I’ve figured it all out and still managed to get good grades, but I definitely have a new found appreciation for people that work/parent, live alone, and go to school!

I didn’t have issues going to work, paying my bills, or doing my school work, but never having a moment when something didn’t have to be done was a new thing for me. At least for me, now that I’m living on my own, I never have any time when I’m not worried about something or something has to be taken care of. I have no real “free” time. Even if I am not immediately occupied with a task, I have to think about what tasks need to be completed and how I’m going to pay for them-24/7. If it’s not work and a bus running late, it’s laundry and cleaning, or school work and preparing for class or final papers. There’s always something coming, there’s never a moment to relax.

Getting the flu really didn’t help either! >_<

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Even when I lived at home I obviously cleaned for myself, worked, and went to school, but I didn't have to worry about my rent check getting to the office on time, or making time for an exterminator to come. If I was hungry I could find a good meal for $7 and just drive to a fast-food place or the grocery store at any hour…

The hardest things about living in NYC have been the sheer nastiness and not having a car. I love everything else about the city, but it's really dirty and I don't like not being able to drive to the grocery store or to get something to eat whenever I want to. I have to go to the grocery story several times a week because I can only buy as much as I can carry. I know that is common in many places in the world, but it's weird for me after living .5 miles from a grocery story for 4 years and having my own car for almost 10 years. You have more options in the city, but I feel like you are less free because you are SO dependent on so many people.

Anyway, I had several New Years resolutions last year and while I didn’t accomplish all of them, I feel like I was pretty successful.

I did lose several pounds (before coming home for Christmas and eating my weight in Mexican food)
I did read A LOT (although, no books cover-to-cover)
I did go to Italy
I did take a trip with a friend to San Antonio and New York this summer
I did cut way back on gossiping (since I don’t know anyone in NYC)
I did cook a lot
I did post a few videos on Youtube

BUT

I didn’t ever make time to volunteer, didn’t make any progress on my student debt, and I have yet to go to Mass in NYC, but I am carrying those resolutions over to 2015! I don’t really have any new resolutions this year, but I do hope to make more friends in NYC, be more patient, and get into a PhD program!

What are your resolutions for 2015? Did you succeed with your resolutions for 2014?

I do have a new hobby: Geocaching! I purchased the app two years ago and never used it but decided to try it out while I am back in Texas for the holidays. If you’ve never done it, you should check it out. It’s a global scavenger hunt using GPS coordinates! If you are interested in following me look me up @thatgingeranna! I am addicted and will be writing a post about it soon!

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I’m registered for classes next semester and will be taking a Latin American history class, a class comparing Nazism and Fascism, and a required course about 20th century American culture!

I absolutely loved my classes this semester. I learned so much and they really challenged the way I think about things. I think one of the most valuable things I learned is that you can’t judge all things based on the same standard of success. There isn’t one way to succeed, whether you are discussing people, political systems, nations, or anything else. If you compare two different things and judge them based on a singular view of success then one will always come up short, but if you judge each system based on a unique definition of success, then you will see that everything is successful in its own way.

I will be in Texas for a couple more weeks, so my next few blogs will chronicle my Geocaching adventures, food, and a few little adventures. While it will be crazy-cold when I get back to NYC I have a few ideas of places to go and things to see before the Spring. My schedule should be a little less wonky than last semester and now that I have this whole living on my own thing down, I hope to blog a little more!

I have a friend that posts a prompt every week for bloggers and I hope to begin responding to that as well!

What would you guys like to read about? Do you have anything (cheap) in New York that you’d like me to check out and report on? Do you need advice or want my opinion on anything?

I hope you all have a great 2015, and I hope to post some entertaining stuff soon! 🙂

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This is Your Captain Speaking: Prepare for Takeoff!

29 Friday Nov 2013

Tags

introduction, personal

IMG_8408

Hello all!

I’ve tried out this blog thing a few times, but I am finally at a point where I can dedicate time to developing a real following and creating unique, fun content, so I am giving it another try! If you’d like to read about something specific, you’re always welcome to make a request! Now that that is out of the way, here’s what you need to know about me: I’m 24 years old (soon to be 25) and I just finished my Masters degree in European History and I wrote my thesis about the decline of the Venetian aristocracy leading up to Napoleon’s invasion in 1797! I started my PhD in August for European History too, but this time around I want to concentrate on modern/contemporary Italian political history. I have been to Italy three times, Greece once, and Spain once! I enjoy traveling, wine, movies (documentaries and romances are my go-to choice), food, languages, fashion, and music! I’m single, Catholic, and pretty nerdy. I grew up in Fort Benning, Georgia, Mililani, Hawaii, and Tulsa, Oklahoma. You guessed it, I’m an Army brat! My family is from Georgia and Alabama, but I don’t really have a “home”! That probably explains my incessant wanderlust…

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